In my counseling class, I feel blessed and enriched by the sharing of the resource persons we had for the past weeks. In our class, I heard about the story of a man who grew up as an orphan and lived in the streets of metro manila. I also heard the testimony of a man who was separated from his family since birth and now that he is of age, he is trying to pick up the pieces of his identity. Two weeks ago, I had the chance to listen to the story of a man who lived a life of addiction and alcoholism, he imparted in our class how alcohol and drug addiction destroyed his family, his dreams, and eventually his own self. Last Thursday, we listened to the story of a man who suffered from severe depression and loneliness, he related to us how he struggled with the lifelessness at the basement of Makati Med during his treatment. For several meeting in our class, I heard different stories from different persons, but all of them, when I listened closely to their sharing, one thing is common and certain – they had experienced how to be tossed by the waves of problems, they came face to face with the wall of adversities, they were shattered by their struggles in life.
In our Gospel today, I noticed that the disciples, in their boat, experienced concretely how to be tossed by the waves, they felt how it was to face an adversity and struggled to come out alive in a situation of an imminent danger and death. Just like the disciples, our class resource persons expressed their fears when they were at their darkest moments. Many of them even said that they felt abandoned by the Lord, it was as if the Lord, while the storm was ongoing in their boat of life, remained asleep in the stern, comfortably laying down on a cushion. But despite their helplessness, they never ran out of courage to call on the Lord’s name and sometimes even question the Lord why He seems so silent, why He seems not to care, why He seems to be indifferent to their sufferings. But the Lord, in His graciousness would always stop the raging storms of life – mostly in His own favorable time.
I heard once that the safest place for the boat is the port or the shore, but boats are not made to stay in the port, boats are meant to sail in the dangerous sea! The Gospel today portrays the disciples leaving the shore to come to the other side. For me this signifies the faith of the disciples in Jesus. When Jesus said “Let us go to the other side” they immediately followed. I believe that that is the mystery of faith – to follow Jesus is to take risks because we don’t know what will happen when we leave the shore of our comfort zones, we don’t know what might take place when we go to the other side. In my religious life, I believe risking includes being faithful to my vows, risking may even mean discovering new horizons in challenging ministries and apostolates, risking may also be shown in an act of forgiving in the community although I know that the person will inflict the same pain again and again, risking may even be manifested by studying well eventhough academic life is in itself challenging and difficult, risking may even include loving not only my enemies but even those who seem unlovable, risking even entails growing deeply in my faith so that I can still risk some more for Jesus and for his kingdom.
By listening to the stories of our resource persons, I realized all the more that as a human being, I have powers within me, which sometimes go in conflict with one another just like a strong wind hurling through the sea. I remember when we discussed addiction in class, the resource person said: all of us are addicts, even without realizing it, we all have our addictions! Our addiction may not necessarily alcohol, drugs, sex, food and any other vices. Our addiction can be in the form of attachment to power, to position of authority, our too much dwelling on our fears, worries, bitterness, hatred, negativity, in other words, addiction can take several forms.
I pray that we all experience the serene grace of the Lord; may Jesus calm our hearts and minds, may we always realize that in every moment of our life, God is will never leave us, He will never leave our boat, no matter how strong the wind blows and whether it is high tide or low tide, God is with us!
THE ELLIS EXPERIENCE 